What does the Bible say about Lust?


Biblically speaking, lust is NOT merely being sexually attracted to or turned on by looking at someone of the opposite sex. Men today have been ridiculed for their nature and saddled with a great burden that comes from feminism on one side, and on the other comes from the church. They are often told that any sexual pleasure they receive from seeing a beautiful woman is sin unless they are married to that woman.

Many Christian books and websites want to “help men with their problem of lust”. Feminist bloggers want to help men to stop “objectifying women”.

But is a man’s natural desire for, and pleasure from, seeing youthful and beautiful women a problem to overcome? Or is it a gift from God, to be appreciated and accepted by both men and women alike?

Lust = Covetousness

In the Bible, lust is synonymous with covetousness. Covetousness is the strong desire to possess something that belongs to another.

Covetousness is not simply admiring something that someone else has, but actually fantasizing about how you can possess that thing.

While it goes against modern western values, people in Biblical times could be the property of other people. The Bible lists these things as man’s property in the 10th commandment:

17 Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything that is thy neighbour’s.

– Exodus 20:17 (KJV)

The 10th commandment and the 7th commandment have something in common – they both talk about crimes against a man regarding his wife.

14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.

– Exodus 20:14 (KJV)

In the context of sexual sin, Coveting (or lusting after) a woman is the sin of desiring to possess her outside of marriage. It is different than simply being attracted to her physically, or even being sexually aroused by her form or having a sexual fantasy about her.

Covetousness first begins when a man goes from finding a woman he cannot marry desirable (which is not sin) to him desiring to UNLAWFULLY possess her (which is fornication).

The second phase of covetousness is when a man goes from his desire to unlawfully possess her (which is already sin) and then he compounds this by actively planning in his mind HOW he could possess her; whether he acts on that plan or not, it is still covetousness and is a grave sin before God.

Fornication (which encompasses all sexually sinful activity) is when a man actually makes good on his covetous thoughts and then takes sexual possession of a woman he cannot marry and has not married. If the woman is another man’s wife, that is Adultery – which is a specific form of fornication.

But isn’t it lust when a man gets sexual pleasure from looking at any woman who is not his wife?

If you are someone who believes your pastor, priest or your church teachings are never wrong in their interpretation of the Bible then you should just close this page and go on believing what they have taught you about lust.

But before you close this article, ask yourself these questions:

  1. Is it wrong to enjoy the smell of pancakes as you enter your favorite pancake restaurant?
  2. Is it wrong to see a commercial on TV for one of your favorite foods and then it makes you feel hungry?

If you answered no to both of these questions above, then I think you should keep reading. But to do so, you will have to acknowledge to yourself the very real possibility that your church might be wrong about some of its teachings.

The Protestant Reformation was fought over this very idea, that church leaders are not always right in their doctrines or understanding of the Bible. That is why the battle cry of the reformation was “Sola Scriptora”, meaning “Scripture alone”. While the Protestants did a good job of removing a lot of unbiblical Catholic tradition and teaching, they did not remove it all. Some errors crept into the early church even while the Apostles were still alive. After they died, the flood gates opened and many errors entered the early church and then the Catholic Church piled on more.

So if you answered “no” to my two questions above, and you can at least entertain the idea that sometimes our church leaders are wrong in some of their teachings about what the Bible says – then I invite you to examine the evidence for yourself and make your own determination.

How many passages talk about a man lusting after a woman?

There are only two passages in all the Bible that deal with the subject of a man looking at a woman. I know, it’s hard to believe that an entire elaborate doctrine of our churches is completely based on two passages, right?

The first and most common passage I will deal with is found in the Sermon on the Mount:

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

– Matthew 5:27-28 (KJV)

This passage is part of the most famous sermon Jesus Christ ever gave.

I can’t tell you how many times I heard that verse in youth group at my church growing up, or how many times my mom read that to me as a teenager. As an adult I have heard entire sermons preached on just those two verses.

Seems pretty straightforward, right? If a man looks at a woman with lust (sexual desire), he has committed adultery with her in his heart, even though he has not physically touched her, right?

Whenever we try to understand God’s Word, we need to make sure we are understanding his Word within the full context of how it was written. Luckily for us the full context is just two verses. There is one word in both these verses that gives us the context of what Christ is addressing – ADULTERY (English translation of the Greek word “Moicheuo”).

If you look up every Old Testament passage about adultery, it always means the sin of a man sleeping with another man’s wife. Basically, adultery was a property crime: if you slept with another man’s wife, you violated his property.

So if the context here is clearly talking about something involving a married woman, then why do the translators say “woman” in verse 28, instead of “wife”?

An excellent question. I am glad you asked it. The reason is “tradition”, since this verse has been traditionally used by the church through the ages to propagate a certain teaching about lust, they had to make it “woman”.

The actual Greek word they are translating is “Gune”, which can be translated as “woman” or “wife” – depending on the context. So let’s expand our context and show our Lord’s statements together:

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery[Moicheuo]:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman[Gune] to lust after her hath committed adultery[Moicheuo] with her already in his heart.

29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife[Gune], let him give her a writing of divorcement:

32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife[Gune], saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery[Moicheuo]: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery[Moicheuo].

– Matthew 5:27-32 (KJV)

So as can clearly be seen, the translators of the KJV and all modern translations decided to follow the tradition of translating verse 28 as “woman” instead of wife, even though the context was clearly speaking of Adultery, which can only happen with a married woman! This was and continues to be, a completely political translation of Scripture.

So we have now handled two of the three key words to understanding this one and ONLY passage of Scripture that our current doctrines around sexual lust are built upon. The last key word is Lust. Our English word lust in verse 28 is translated from the Greek word Epithumeo. Once again this word, like Gune (“woman” or “wife”) can be translated differently depending on its context. The word literally means “to desire”. Sometimes it’s talking about desiring good things; other times it’s talking about desiring bad things.

With all that being said – I believe in all sincerity that this is the correct interpretation of this passage based on its context – Adultery:

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on [another man’s wife and fantasizes about how he may possess her for himself] hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

– Matthew 5:27-28 (KJV)

There is at least one undeniable truth from Matthew 5:27-28

The context is clearly talking about a married woman, so this in no way applies to single people. While the act of physical sex outside of marriage is forbidden, nowhere in the Scripture does it forbid a single man from having sexual desire toward a single woman, or being turned on by a single woman, or even sexually fantasizing about her. The same goes for a single woman: nowhere does the Bible condemn a single woman for being turned on by viewing the body of a single man.

But what about a man (married or single) who looks at a married woman and is sexually aroused by her form? What if he even imagines what she might look like naked? What if he later has a sexual fantasy about her? Is this all sin? Is some of it sin?

I submit to you that none of the above scenarios are sin. Where the sin occurs is when a man goes from finding a married woman desirable to him desiring to unlawfully possess her(fornicate with her). After he has allowed himself to desire to possess her, then he will most likely begin to fantasize about how he might possess her.

If he allows himself to desire to unlawfully possess her he has entered the realm of sin and has planted the seeds for further sin. If he then starts thinking about how he can lure her from her husband he has sinned even more even if he never acts on these plans.

A key principle regarding lust and covetousness is that even before he began planning on how to possess her – his first sin of covetousness was in allowing himself to desire to unlawfully possess her before any plan on how to do that came to mind. A plan on how to unlawfully possess someone or something that is forbidden is not required for covetousness to occur – simply the desire to possess something God does not allow us to possess is sin.

What about Job 31?


With everything we have learned while studying Matthew 5:27-28, we can now address the second of only two passages in the Bible addressing this subject of a man lusting after a woman.

1 I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?

9 If mine heart have been deceived by a woman, or if I have laid wait at my neighbour’s door;

10 Then let my wife grind unto another, and let others bow down upon her.

11 For this is an heinous crime; yea, it is an iniquity to be punished by the judges.

– Job 31:1 & 9-11 (KJV)

Clearly verses 9-11 are talking about a married woman – “my neighbour’s door”, so this is talking about committing adultery, or thinking about possessing another’s wife in one’s heart.

But what about verse one where he says he made a covenant with his eyes? Some translations translate this as “gaze at a virgin” and others “look lustfully at a virgin”. Again, we need to look at the actual Hebrew terms and scrape away translator bias and church tradition bias.

The Hebrew word “maid” here is “Bethuwlah” and it is always translated as talking about an unmarried woman or virgin. The Hebrew word translated as “think” is also translated as “perceive” or “consider”. Most people would agree that it is ridiculous to think Job is saying a man could never think about a young unmarried woman, otherwise no one would ever get married.

The problem in this passage is, we don’t have the context of what he is thinking about with this woman. Those who are proponents of the belief that it is sin for a man to be sexually aroused by any woman other than his wife will fill in the blank for us and say it is talking about sexual arousal or sexual fantasy about a virgin girl.

I submit to you that this is talking about more than just sexual arousal or even sexual fantasy, but instead Job 31:1 is the comtemplation of pre-marital sex. Job is saying “I will never look at a virgin and think of how I might take her sexually without marrying her”.

16 And the damsel’s father shall say unto the elders, I gave my daughter unto this man to wife, and he hateth her;

17 And, lo, he hath given occasions of speech against her, saying, I found not thy daughter a maid; and yet these are the tokens of my daughter’s virginity. And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city.

– Deuteronomy 22:16-17 (KJV)

4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

– Hebrews 13:4 (KJV)

In the Law of Moses as well as the book of Hebrews in the New Testament we can see that God only sees three ways that sexual relations can occur between a man and a woman:

  1. Whoremongering (sex outside of marriage)
  2. Marriage (sex within marriage)
  3. Adultery (a man having sex with another man’s wife)

There is only one type of sexual relations between a man and woman that the Bible calls “honorable in all” and “undefiled” – and that is sex between a man and woman within the bounds of marriage.

This is what Job 31:1 is referring to – a man should never fantasize about how he can “entice” a young woman into having sex with him outside of marriage. This is also why prostitution is sinful, because it is sex outside the bounds of marriage.

Conclusion and Application

Matthew 5:27-28 is talking about the sin of a man coveting another man’s wife. It is the desire to possess a woman that belongs to another man.

Job 31:1 is talking about a man thinking of enticing a young virgin into having sex with him outside of marriage.

Remember at the beginning of this article I asked you these 2 questions:

  1. Is it wrong to enjoy the smell of pancakes as you enter your favorite pancake restaurant?
  2. Is it wrong to see a commercial on TV for one of your favorite foods and then it makes you feel hungry?

You may be asking what these questions have to do with a man begin sexually aroused by the sight of a woman (married or single, it does not matter).

It is a biological fact that the same area of a man’s brain that causes hunger and gives pleasure from the smell, sight and taste of food is the exact same area that gives a man pleasure from the smell, sight and touch of a woman.

The average man’s brain is sexually stimulated by visual cues and is built for variety…

“Using functional MRI scans, researchers examined the brains of young men as they looked at pictures of beautiful women. They found that feminine beauty affects a man’s brain at a very primal level – similar to what a hungry person gets from a good meal or addict gets from a fix. One of the researchers said, “This is hard core circuitry. This is not a conditioned response.” Another concluded, “Men apparently cannot do anything about their pleasurable feelings [in the presence of beauty].””

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 99 “His Brain, Her Brain”)


“Telling men not to become aroused by signs of youth and health is like telling them not to experience sugar as sweet.”

– David M. Buss, PhD (pg. 71 “The Evolution of Desire”)

So the two questions I asked about food could then be changed to these questions:

  1. Is it wrong for a man to be sexually aroused by the scent of a woman?
  2. Is it wrong for a man to be sexually aroused if a beautiful woman accidentally rubs against him in a hallway?
  3. Is it wrong for a man to be sexually aroused by the sight of a beautiful woman – whether he is married to her or not?

The Biblical answer to all these questions is – it is NOT A SIN for man to be sexually aroused by the scent, touch or sight of a woman, whether he is married to her or not.

While most of what I have said here could also apply to a woman being sexually attracted to a man, this is something that affects men much more than women.

To the men reading this, you now have a choice to make. You have been presented with Biblical evidence that the sin of lusting after (coveting) a woman is when a man goes from finding a woman sexually desirable (he is aroused by the sight of her, wonders what she looks like naked or has a sexual fantasy about her) to this same mane desiring to unlawfully possess this woman(to fornicate with her).

In many cases, once a man has allowed himself to desire this forbidden married woman, or desire sex with a single woman outside of marriage, he will also begin to plan in his mind how he can bring this to pass. But the planning stage is not required for covetousness to occur; covetousness occurs the moment a man allows himself to desire to possess someone or something God does not allow him to possess.

Your choices are:

  1. Will you accept how God has designed you, that being turned on by a beautiful woman (married or otherwise) is no more a sin than being made hungry by the sight or smell of your favorite food?
  2. Will you continue to beat yourself up, and buy the lies of feminism that you are “objectifying women” if you are turned on by a woman simply by the sight of her without knowing anything about her?
  3. Will you continue to allow your church leaders to put you on guilt trips from receiving pleasure simply from the sight of beautiful women around you?

 Remember, the sin only comes when your sexual attraction, or even fantasy about a woman, turns into a covetous desire to possess her sexually outside of marriage. It really is that simple.

 Yes, the Bible tells us that we need to fight our sinful natures with the help of God, but it does not tell us that we have to fight how God designed us. We as men should embrace our design, not fight it.

That does not mean we need to shove all this information in our girlfriends’ or wives’ faces.

We can practice discretion. It also does not mean being rude and gawking at beautiful women and making them feel uncomfortable is ok. What it does mean is that if you get a quick glance of a beautiful woman, or accidentally brush against a beautiful woman on the train or bus and you get feelings of pleasure from that – you have done NOTHING wrong.

One final note. Anything can be abused; for example, hunger and the pleasure from eating food is something God built into men and women. But this same hunger for food can be abused and then it can become gluttony. In the same way we cannot allow ourselves to become obsessed with sexual pleasure to the point that it interferes with intimacy in our marriage, or other areas of our life. Everything needs to be kept in balance.

But just as men and women both hunger for and receive pleasure from eating food, so do men have a natural hunger for and receive pleasure from the sight, scent and brief touches of beautiful women, whether they are complete strangers or women they know; it makes absolutely no difference. It is absolutely by God’s design, and no man should ever feel shame for this. It is only when he allows his natural sexual desires to turn into a desire to possess a woman sexually outside of marriage that he has now entered the realm of covetousness and lust which is sin.

How God made man superior to woman


We live in a world that is doing everything it can to deny the gifts that God has given to man. And I don’t mean mankind, but male human beings. Men are not superior to women, yet they have many superior abilities when compared to women. For several decades it was politically incorrect even to discuss these differences between men and women. But we do not need a scientific study to show what has always been right before our very eyes.

It is great though that with new MRI technology we can now verify differences in how men’s brains work from women’s. Not only can we see and observe the differences from the outside, but now we can see them on the inside as well in the most complex organ of the human body, the brain.

There are many non-Christian scientists and psychologists today that can no longer follow the politically correct agenda of feminists and egalitarians. More and more scientists and studies are verifying the vastly different physiological and psychological differences between the sexes.

Men are different from women. They are equal only in their common membership in the same species, humankind. To maintain that they are the same in aptitude, skill or behavior is to build a society based on a biological and scientific lie.

– Anne Moir and David Jessel (pg. 30 “Brain Sex: The Real Difference Between Men and Women”)

As Christians we applaud and agree with the finding of these differences. Our only disagreements come when we talk about the source of these differences, evolution versus the intelligent design of our God and creator.

Superior, inferior or just different?

Before I go further into this I want to say a few more things about what has become a controversial topic – mainly the FACT that men have some superior abilities to women in many areas.

If you give this blog a fair reading, you will see I do not hate women. I do hate, and I believe God also hates, the ideology of feminism. It seems today like every time some study comes out that women are better at this or that than men – everybody is applauding it from the rooftops.

But in our society we are not allowed to say men are better than women at anything and anytime it is brought up excuses are made and it is simply a “cultural” thing, otherwise women will always be equal to or excel past men – or so we are told. On the rare occasion that women can’t deny a male advantage in something, then they just say “so what” and want you to shut up.

This site will make no apologies for giving glory to God’s marvelous design of man (and I mean males). There is a difference in saying “men are awesome, and women stink” and saying “men are superior to women in certain ways”. The fact is, in many ways women are inferior to men, but so too men are also inferior to women in some ways. To say so is not rude, or mean, it is simply a Biblical fact that is backed up by science.

There are some things about men and women that aren’t an issue of being superior or inferior to the other – they are just about differences. An example of this would be the different ways men and women approach sexuality. One is not superior to the other, but they are different, and complementary.

But I don’t think we are being fully truthful when we say that a man having 50% more strength than a woman is just a “difference”. No way! It’s a superior capability. When I talk about how woman is superior to man I will gladly acknowledge that women have superior hearing and color-perception to men; again, it is not a difference, it is a superiority!

With all that said as an introduction, I will begin our discussion of how God made man superior to woman with this verse:

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

– Psalm 139:14 (NIV)


Men are superior to women in strength, endurance and athletics

God made man taller and stronger than woman. In the United States men are typically 6 inches taller than women. Men on average have 40% more upper body strength and 33% more lower body strength than women. Men are much leaner than women with typically 50% less body fat than the average woman carries in her body. Of course there are exceptions where a man may have very little muscle mass and a woman has more muscle mass, but these are just that – exceptions. Both science and general observation show that men are typically larger and more muscular than women without working out or doing anything artificially to change their bodies.

There is a popular misconception that women have a higher tolerance to pain than men because of the horrendous pain they endure before, during and sometimes even after childbirth. But that is actually a myth.

“This study has serious implications about how we treat women after surgery as well as women who experience chronic pain…. Because women have more nerve receptors, they may experience pain more powerfully than men, requiring different surgical techniques, treatments or medicine dosages to help manage their pain and make them feel comfortable.”

– Dr. Bradon Wilhelmi, a member of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons


Not only do men have less nerve receptors in their skin (so they feel less pain), but their skin is also up to 25% thicker than women’s. Men not only have thicker skin, but they also have better clotting ability which makes their wounds heal faster. Men also have stronger bones, tendons and ligaments.

Men are more aggressive and competitive than women

A male’s major sex hormone, testosterone, impacts his behavior…testosterone is the hormone most associated with male aggressiveness, competitiveness, and assertiveness…. Furthermore competitiont raises testosterone levels and rivalry fuels aggression. For example, the testosterone levels among athletes are actually highest at the end of a competition rather than at the beginning…

Testosterone also helps a man focus on a project, competition, mission or venture…. Researchers at Georgia State University found that the “high performers” tested in each field (business leaders, politicians, sportsmen, and the like) had higher levels of testosterone.

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 42 “His Brain, Her Brain”)


When we take into account that men have superior strength, stamina and sensory motor skills along with a built-in desire to compete and be aggressive, it is no surprise that the vast majority of the best athletes in the world are men.

Professional sports is an area in which we want to see nothing but the best. The WNBA gets a tiny fraction of the audience that the NBA does. And no, it’s not cultural! Common sense, and a general observation of the world around us tells us it’s more fun to watch men play sports than women, men are the best athletes – period.

Men’s aggressive and competitive natures, along with their tendency to take more risks makes men highly suited to starting up new businesses or managing businesses. Again, this is the primary reason why even today, generations after the rise of feminism, men still heavily dominate the entrepreneurial and management aspects of the business world.

The state of our military today is a sad story. We have allowed the politicians to force the military commanders to allow women in combat. I don’t care about what the liberal mouth-piece generals say when they put them on TV. A man’s body is vastly superior when it comes to combat. You put that woman on the front lines in battle and you are going to get a lot of men killed when they go out of their way to protect her, or she is just going to get killed. This is yet another common sense thing, which any person, educated or otherwise can see with their own eyes. It would be funny if it were not so sad and pathetic.

In summing up this section, we can see the fact that God has designed man larger, stronger and tougher than woman to naturally equip him for the protection and provision roles he has assigned to man. If only our world would regain some of the common sense it used to have and acknowledge what is right in front of their very eyes.

The denial of God’s unique design of man and woman is not just some disagreement. It is a fundamental doctrine taught all throughout the Scriptures, and it is wickedness and foolishness to deny the creator’s design and plan when he made man and woman.

18 The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, 19 since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them….

21 For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22 Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools…

– Romans 1:18-19 & 21b-22 (NIV)



Men are superior to women in STEM fields (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics)

Psychological tests also reveal patterns of sex difference. On average, males finish faster and score higher than females on a test that requires the taker to visualize an object’s appearance after it is rotated in three dimensions. The same is true for map-reading tests, and for embedded-figures tests, which ask subjects to find a component shape hidden within a larger design. Males are over-represented in the top percentiles on college-level math tests and tend to score higher on mechanics tests than females do.

…males on average have a stronger drive to systemize, and females to empathize. Systemizing involves identifying the laws that govern how a system works….

– Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen, Cambridge University


A man’s brain is made to systemize things, to analyze, construct and explore. When we accept that God gave men some superior abilities to women in these areas then it will come as no shock that 73% of computer scientists are men. We won’t cry “discrimination” when we hear that six out of seven engineers are men.

I have worked in software development for about 15 years. I would agree that probably 1 in 4 software developers are women. The honest truth is though, most of the female developers I have worked with (even with them representing about 1 in 4 developers) were not always as good at problem-solving as the men. That is not to say there are not some very sharp female developers. I have one in mind who I worked with several years ago who was a great problem-solver. And anyone in the hacker area knows there are some genius-level hackers that are female. So my point is not to say that no woman can compete with a man in the area of computer technology, or any other STEM field. The point is there are far, far fewer women that can compete with men in this area; it is not a matter of discrimination, it is just a matter of how God distributes his gifts.

I would bet though, that the women who are great at programming or other technology use different parts of their brain to do what they do than what men do. So I would still agree that a man’s brain is naturally wired for these STEM fields, and a woman’s brain if she is good at them will be sort of “hotwired”, uniquely wired differently than the average woman and it allows her to do these types of technical jobs.


A man’s drive to systemize will manifest itself in many different ways depending on the man. Some men have a need to systemize mechanical things and that’s why they love working on cars or fixing things around the house. Other men love to systemize things by exploring their world whether in traveling to exotic lands or mountain-climbing or other dangerous endeavors. Still other men utilize their systemizing abilities in a much less physical way, and a more cerebral one. Some men want to explore and systemize the world around them through religion, politics, philosophy, science, and technology. One cross-over area that men of many different backgrounds like is video games. Video games allow men to systemize, compete and conquer. It is no wonder that the vast majority of video gamers are men.

There are more highly intelligent men than highly intelligent women

While men and women have about the same average IQ (according to intelligence testing), men vary much more than women do. What that means is there are more men at each spectrum of intelligence than women (below average and above average). However, after crossing the average intelligence threshold the amount of men who have above average IQs begins to dominate the women, bringing us to the point where there are eight genius-level IQ men to every one woman genius.

When we accept the strengths that God has given man in his brain, then we are not shocked to discover that there are eight male geniuses to every one female genius. We don’t say “the survey must be wrong”, or “it’s just a cultural thing” – NO! We accept it is how God made man.


Men are built for conquest and leadership

These biological differences are critical for women to understand because boys, and the men they grow up to be, have brains that are built to be more aggressive, more impulsive, and more assertive–their design is to earn their self-worth. They are compelled to discover their calling and meaning in life. They are made to conquer the world around them, and they begin their conquests at a surprisingly early age… By six months of age, boys are far less fearful than girls, and “fearlessness” is associated with levels of testosterone (the higher level of testosterone, the higher the level of “fearlessness”); by thirteen months, boys are demonstrably more aggressive and assertive than girls; and by thirty-six months, boys dominate mixed-gender groups of children.

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 116 “His Brain, Her Brain”)

The first question a man usually asks another man when they meet for the first time is, “What do you do?” …most men identify themselves by their work. God created men to “do” something in the field. Watch young boys as they pick up sticks and turn them into imaginary guns or tools. Recently a mother told us she had prevented her son from having any toy guns or using sticks as pretend rifles, but when he made his cheese sandwich into the form of a pistol and was shooting a friend, she cried out in exasperation, “I give up!”

Mothers should never give up because this is simply part of a boy’s nature. He is called to be a hunter, a worker, a doer. He wants to make his conquest in the field of life. The academic term for this is the “instrumentality of the male.” From childhood there is something in a male that makes him like adventure and conquest. He wants to go into the field to hunt or to work some way.

– Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (pg. 168 “Love and Respect”)


Men are built to conquer the world around them. They are built to lead, and boys follow boys and stop following girls at a very young age. Men find their value in what they do, in what they accomplish. As we previously established, men are systemizers, and the best place for they to systemize is out in the world. I believe it is Biblical that a woman’s place is in the home: not saying she can never go out, but that caring for the needs of her husband, her children and her home should be the focus of her life.

However, it would be Biblically, and even biologically correct to say that a man is the polar opposite in this area. A man’s place is outside the home – hunting, working, achieving, exploring, building and yes, even fighting. Some men are built to be warriors, whether on the athletic field or on the battlefield.

Mothers need to respect and help channel their boys’ God-given need for conquest and not try to make their sons more like their daughters. Wives need to respect their husbands’ need for achievement, to work, and to make his mark on the world.

So mom, when you see your little boys playing cops and robbers – let them! When you see them wrestling, let them! When your boy wants a toy gun for his birthday, get it for him? When he wants a shooter video game, let him! With some of the violent shootings in the last decade parents have been paranoid about letting their little boys play with guns and shooter video games.

Let me help you with something – those people who did those shootings did not do what they did because of playing with toy guns or video games as a child. There is one of two reasons mass shootings occur. One is because of parental neglect, or verbal or physical abuse that warped the child’s mind. The other reason is one we don’t like to accept in this day and age. Some children are raised with two loving parents, and maybe even a mom who took care of them when they were little. They are simply born evil and sadistic and psychotic, plain and simple.

If men are wired for conquest and leadership, should men also be involved in the home and with their family? Absolutely! Are there times when a man is called to sacrifice his job because it is hurting his family? Yes. But while men need to be good husbands and fathers, they also have a drive and need to make their mark on the world, and the woman who ignores this, or tries to downplay this as selfishness, does so to her own peril.

Men have a deep need for respect

A man’s need for conquest, to work and to achieve is also directly related to his need for respect. I really appreciated when Dr. Emerson Eggerichs came out with his book “Love and Respect”. He may not have been the first author in recent decades to talk about a man’s need for respect, but the fact that he focused basically half a book to it was great.

Men and women both need love and respect, but God has wired man so that respect is his first need and the emotional side of love is secondary to that. If a man feels disrespected by his colleagues or especially his wife and children, this will cause him a great deal of pain and he will most likely react in very negative ways towards disrespect.

When a woman accepts and appreciates her husband’s need for respect, she will most likely see a transformation in her marriage. Women who take the attitude that “I will respect him when I think he has earned it” will never experience the full happiness in marriage that is possible if they would just show him the respect that he needs.

Men are wired to be the primary provider for the home

God has made man with a built-in desire to be the primary provider for his family. If his wife has a more successful career than him, in many marriages it eventually destroys the marriage. His self-respect, as well as his wife’s self-respect is tied to his ability to be the primary provider (the one who makes the most money). It is not uncommon for men who become disabled (and their wives are forced to support the family) to become very depressed; it violates the man’s nature down to his very core.

This is not some simple pride thing as some feminists have tried to say, but a built-in desire given by God in men. It would be the same as woman’s built-in desire to have children (often times called her “biological clock”).

Well into feminism’s second generation, there are finally a significant number of women reaching parity with the men in their fields–not to mention surpassing them–and winning the salary, bonuses, and perks that signify their arrival… Yet this proud professional achievement often seems to have unhappy consequences at home.

Neither the newly liberated alpha women nor their shell-shocked beta spouses seem comfortable with the role reversal.

According to psychologists (and divorce lawyers) who see couples struggling with such changes, many relationships follow the same patter. First, the wife starts to lose respect for her husband, then he begins to feel emasculated, and then sex dwindles to a full stop.


Suppose that both men and women are happier – all else being equal – the more money their spouse makes. In such a world, couples wouldn’t care whether the man or woman earns more, so the population of couples would have what we call a “normal distribution,” and would be captured in a bell-shaped curve. But that’s not what we see in the real-world data.

Instead, there is a sharp drop in the number of male-female couples at exactly the point where the woman starts to earn more than half of household income.

This finding supports earlier research from speed-dating sessions, which found that while women prefer men to be intelligent and ambitious, men have these preferences for women only to the point where women threaten to earn more than they do.


Aversion to wives earning more than husbands could be leading to fewer weddings and more divorces, according to a National Bureau of Economic Research working paper released this month by Marianne Bertrand and Emir Kamenica, University of Chicago Booth School of Business economists, and Jessica Pan at the National University of Singapore.

Compiling results from surveys taken by the U.S. Census Bureau and by the Labor Department, the reserachers came to several conclusions. One was that marriage rates decline as the probability that a woman earns more than a man increases.


Even people that are in favor of feminist changes in our society see the problems. We just disagree about the causes and the solution. Both sides agree that men are generally not attracted to women who are smarter or make more money than them, and when they do get with a woman who becomes more successful it usually takes a terrible toll on the marriage.

Feminist advocates just argue it’s caused by a culture that says men need to be the primary breadwinner. In their view it is just about changing hearts and minds and then men and women will all live together in a wonderful utopia. Those of us who oppose these feminist changes will maintain that it is something that is wired biologically into men, and if it is biological, no amount of social brain-washing of men will change this.

Marriage rates are declining, while divorce rates stay close to 50 percent. Divorce rates have slightly declined from their high in the 1980s. But what is not mentioned is that one of the contributing factors to the divorce-rate decline is that people are just not marrying as much as they used to. Couples are just cohabitng much more. I would argue that if we could get good studies on the breakup rate of long-term cohabiting couples and then combine that with divorce rates, we would go well beyond the 50-percent divorce rate we had in the 1980s.

Either way you slice it, most relationships between men and women do not work well when the wife is more intelligent and makes more money than the husband. In the rare instances where it does work, I guarantee you will find a feminine man who is low on testosterone, or a man who had a domineering and aggressive mother who beat his father down. Even in relationships where a man is forced to stay home because he is disabled, if he is honest he will tell you it drives him nuts that his wife has to support the family. It does not just go against our cultural values, but it goes against male biology itself.

Men are built to compartmentalize

None of us will ever agree with everything in a marriage book. But the book “Men Are Like Waffles – Women Are Like Spaghetti” is still a great book and I highly recommend it. The very title of the book, as well as their other descriptions in the book, gives a great picture of the different ways a man’s brain works from a woman’s brain.

If you look down at a waffle, you see a collection of boxes separated by walls. The boxes are all separate from each other and make convenient holding places. That is typically how a man processes life. Our thinking is divided up into boxes that have room for one issue and one issue only…. The typical man lives in one box at a time and one box only. When a man is at work, he is at work. When he is in the garage tinkering around, he is in the garage tinkering. When he is watching TV, he is simply watching TV. That is why he looks as though he is in a trance and can ignore everything else going on around him. Social scientists call this “compartmentalizing”–that is, putting life and responsibilities into different compartments.

As a result, men are problem solvers by nature. They enter a box, size up the “problem,” and formulate a solution….

In contrast to men’s waffle-like approach, women process life more like a plate of pasta. If you look at a plate of spaghetti, you notice that there are lots of individual noodles that all touch one another. If you attempted to follow one noodle around the plate, you would intersect a lot of other noodles, and you might even switch to another noodle seamlessly. That is how women face life. Every thought and issue is connected to every other thought and issue in some way. Life is much more of a process for women than it is for men.

This is why women are typically better at multitasking than men. She can talk on the phone, prepare a meal, make a shopping list, work on the agenda for tomorrow’s business meeting, give instructions to her children as they are going out to play, and close the door with her foot without skipping a beat. Because all her thoughts, emotions, and convictions are connected, she is able to process more information and keep track of more activites.

– Bill & Pam Farrel (pg. 11, 13 “Men Are Like Waffles–Women Are Life Spaghetti”)


Bill and Pam Farrel did an amazing job with this illustration of how men and women process life differently. Are there exceptions where some men may be great at multitasking? Of course there are. But the vast majority (I would safely say 90%) of men are exactly as Bill and Pam describe. We will cover God’s design for women in a separate paper, but their description of how women process the world is spot on as well.

Conclusion and Application

Whether you are a Christian reading this, or a non-Christian I invite you to examine the evidence both from biology as well as your own general observations of human behavior. Will there be exceptions? Yes. There are some men who have behaviors and abilities that more mimic the typical woman, and there are some women who have behaviors and abilities that more mirror the typical man. But these are rare.

As believers we have a source of truth that not only confirms the differences we see in biology and typical gender behaviors, but it also gives a reason for the differences. It gives us a purpose, if we will only believe and accept it.

To the men I say, will you accept how God has made you? Will you accept the purpose for your differences and use them in accordance with his plan? Will you lead your families, protect your families and provide for your families even if your abilities are not as strong as other men in various areas? Will you pray to God to strengthen your weaknesses?

To the women I say, will you accept how God has made men?

Moms – will you accept that it is ok that your boys are more aggressive than your girls? Will you accept your little boy’s need to compete, his need to conquer the world around him? Will you resist the ungodly world’s call to feminize him, to soften him or to emasculate him?

Wives – will you accept your husband’s God-given need to lead you, protect you and provide for you? Will you stop trying to compete with him, and just complete him with the unique gifts God has given you as a woman?

We must all accept that God has built man to systemize, to compartmentalize, to conquer and to compete. Accept that a man needs to be respected, even before his need for love. Accept the differences God has made, and do not try to minimize them or ignore them. Our world is doing that now, to our own destruction.

You may have noticed I left out a huge area of God’s design of man, and that is his sexuality. I have opted to cover that in a completely separate paper because I really don’t believe I can do it justice in just a few paragraphs. Look for a separate post on human sexuality coming soon.

Other sources:





How God made woman superior to man

Man and Woman with Working Brain in blackboard Style

To deny that God made woman uniquely different from man is like denying the Sun is different from the Moon. Denying the special gifts that God gave only to woman is to rob her and the rest of humanity of the true joy that God intended for his creation. In this post, we will explore how God made woman in all her wondrous ways, and how her physical and psychological attributes perfectly equip her for the role for which God created her.

The Bible says:

9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

– I Corinthians 11:9 (KJV)

When we look at man, we can see how a woman in almost every way is man’s opposite. Men are tough, women are soft. Men are project-oriented, women are people-oriented. Men love to compete, women are more cooperative. As I have previously discussed, man and woman were both made for the glory of God. However, how God accomplishes his glory is different in man from how it is in woman.

God made man to have a creature who would come closest to his nature. Man represents God’s love exemplified through his leadership, provision and protection. Man, also, is able to symbolize God’s wrath and judgment through his aggression.

God made woman to be a help meet for man. Woman brings glory to God by modeling God the Son’s submission to God the Father by submitting to her husband and helping him in every way she can.

3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

– I Corinthians 11:3 (KJV)

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

– Ephesians 5:23-24 (KJV)

Literally the phrase “help meet” is a helper that is suitable for man. God knew that he wanted man and woman to reproduce and have children. He gave women the responsibility, as well as the capability, of bearing the sons and daughters of men. Women were not only designed to bear children, but they were also designed to raise children. However, a woman’s body was not only designed for reproduction, but it was also designed to give pleasure and comfort to men.

Whenever we have a discussion of differences in gender, people run from the words like “superior” or “better” and we are only allowed to use the word “different”. Some things between men and women are not really a matter of being better or superior, but they truly are just differences.

But when one gender simply excels at something over the other gender’s ability, I don’t think it is wrong to use the words “better” or “superior”. I believe we should honor God’s creation and the beautiful differences, as well as superiorities between genders.

With all that said as an introduction, I will begin our discussion of how God made woman superior to man with this verse:

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

– Psalm 139:14 (NIV)

Women are superior to men in language and facial recognition abilities

…researchers found that areas of the brain involved in language and fine motor skills (such as handwriting) mature about six years earlier in girls than in boys.


A new brain connectivity study from Penn Medicine published today in the Proceedings of National Academy of Sciences found striking differences in the neural wiring of men and women that’s lending credence to some commonly-held beliefs about their behavior.

…in females, the wiring goes between the left and right hemispheres, suggesting that they facilitate communication between the analytical and intuition.

…Females outperformed males on attention, word and face memory, and social cognition tests.


There are few men that have been married for any length of time that would argue that their wife is not better at reading people and their emotions than they are. Most men would also agree that their wife often times has a better memory than they do, especially when it comes to relational facts and things that are going on in various family members’ lives.


Women can see more colors than men

Men trail women in discerning shades of blue, yellow, and green, a new study says.

Females are better at discriminating among colors, researchers say, while males excel at tracking fast-moving objects and discerning detail from a distance–evolutionary adaptations possibly linked to our hunter-gatherer past.


So ladies, when you are showing your husband those 4 shades of green for the bedroom, he really probably only sees one color. Even if he can distinguish, the colors just don’t pop out to him the way they do to you.

Maybe the next time you see your hubby putting on the wrong color shirt with his pants, you will just laugh and chuckle instead of wondering how he could do that. I have always considered my wife to be my fashion advisor. I am more colorblind than most men; I just can’t tell what goes with what.

Women can hear more than men

At one week of age, girls can distinguish their mother’s voice from sounds made by another baby. Boys can’t. Scientists who do this work have found that young girls can hear much softer sounds than those audible to young boys. Girls have a sense of hearing that is two to four times better than boys.

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 52 “His Brain, Her Brain”)


Women have a better sense of smell

…women have more taste buds and are significantly superior in tasting bitter and complex flavors.

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 54 “His Brain, Her Brain”)


So, when a mom goes in her teenage boy’s room and can smell the dirty clothes in his room, she needs to understand he probably does not smell a thing. It is her super-smelling ability that allows her to smell all these wonderful things!

Women are better at multi-tasking

…women have superior memory and social cognition skills, making them more equipped for multitasking and creating solutions that work for a group.


Because women have almost 10 times more white matter (processing matter) than men as well as more connections between the right and left hemispheres of the brain, they are better equipped to multi-task than a man. Feminists hate it when people bring up that women are better multi-taskers because this multi-tasking ability is automatically associated with women being better able to manage children than men.

Even non-Christian scientists acknowledge that women evolved this multi-tasking ability to help them care for children. Believers who accept God’s Biblical design for women don’t believe they evolved their multi-tasking ability, but that God purposefully made it as part of a woman’s design from day one to help women in their mothering duties.

A woman’s multi-tasking abilities not only help her in her mothering and home-care duties, but they also assist her in certain occupations outside the home.

According to an article from CNN Money, these were the most common jobs for women in the 1950s as well as today:


About 4 million workers in the United States fell under the category of “secretaries and administrative assistants” between 2006 and 2010, and 96% of them were women, according to the U.S. Census.

– Annalyn Kurtz (CNN Money)

“The good news is over the past 40 years, there are very few jobs in which women have not broken through,” Cameron said. “The glass ceiling is cracking in all different directions, but the bad news is, there is still a sticky floor. Most women still work in traditionally female jobs, like administrative support.”

– Cindia Cameron (9to5, National Association of Working Women)


Both of the female contributors to the article above lament that while some women have broken into more traditionally male-dominated fields, the vast majority of women have not. This is a great mystery to them and something that needs to be overcome.

But if we understand and accept how God has created and designed women, the fact that the majority of women who work outside the home work in these fields makes perfect sense.

All of these fields require abilities that women typically surpass men in. Secretaries, cashiers and clerical workers are all fields that require excellent multi-tasking abilities. Elementary school teachers require multi-tasking ability to manage a classroom full of young children.

Nurses and nursing aides require multi-tasking as well.

To deny that women excel in multi-tasking would be the same as denying that tigers are faster than elephants. While it is true that the fastest running elephants run at around 30 mph and the slowest running tigers may run around 25 to 30 mph, we never take the exceptions to negate the norm.

So yes, there may be some men that are better than some women at multi-tasking, but these are exceptions, and not the norm.

This brings us to perhaps the greatest gift God has given women.

Mother with newborn sun

Women are empathizers

The sex differences in nurturing appear…well before girls and boys are capable of reliably discriminating between the genders or knowing which behaviors are more characteristic of one than the other. Even among children ages twelve months to twenty months, exposure to the distress of other people causes girls to respond with more empathy and less indifference than boys…. Multiple studies have concluded that women are “more empathetic, tender-minded and nurturing than men.”

– Dr. Walt Larimore, MD (pg. 120 “His Brain, Her Brain”)


A woman’s greatest gift is her ability to feel the emotions of others. She truly feels them, in a way most men never can. A woman’s gentleness, her sensitiveness and her empathy are the defining characteristics of the psyche for the vast majority of women. In fact, in most cultures around the world a woman who is not gentle, sensitive and empathetic is not only considered to be strange, but un-feminine.

I am not saying that there are not women who struggle with these qualities, but God has called women to cultivate these attributes in themselves even if they do not come as naturally to some women as to others.

It then comes as no surprise that we find the vast majority of nurses as well as daycare workers to be women. Women are well-gifted at anticipating the needs of others, both emotional and physical. This makes women well-suited to the most important task requiring their empathy – the nurturing and caring of their children.

One of the greatest joys of a woman’s life is the carrying of a child in her womb, and then one day the holding of that child in her arms. Most women can tell you every detail of their pregnancies, births and the weaning of their children.

In the Bible, bareness was considered a curse, because a woman knew this was one of the main purposes for which her mind and body were designed. I am not saying women who have not been able to bear children are under a curse, because sometimes God simply does not allow it. My second wife (after divorcing my first wife), was not able to bear children. But she has had the joy and privilege of being a great step-mother to my children from my first marriage. She still grieves at times when her friends or relatives get pregnant, and it is very difficult for her. This is the natural reaction of a woman when she cannot have children of her own.

A woman’s body compliments the nature of her mind

Just as a woman’s mind is soft and gentle, so too her body is soft and gentle. A man’s body is not designed for beauty or appearance, but for work and combat. A woman’s body is the opposite: her body is designed to be beautiful. A woman is God’s most beautiful creation. A woman’s body is designed to serve the needs of men and their children. I realize this statement will be highly offensive to the modern feminist woman, but sometimes the truth is offensive.

This does not mean that men have a right to mistreat women as some have from the beginning of creation. A woman is to be treated as a precious and delicate treasure, not as someone to be beaten or physically or emotionally abused.

In fact, God warns men that if they mistreat their wives, God will not hear their prayers.

7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

– I Peter 3:7 (KJV)

So, the fact that a woman’s body was created to serve the needs of men and their children in no way diminishes her importance and does not give anyone the right to treat her with disrespect. Men who do dishonor and mistreat their wives do so to their own peril.

With that being said let us explore God’s wonderful work of art – a woman’s body.



A woman’s breasts are a visible symbol to the world of her womanhood

Breasts are considered to be the defining physical symbol of womanhood.

8 We have a little sister, and she hath no breasts: what shall we do for our sister in the day when she shall be spoken for?

– Song of Solomon 8:8 (KJV)

While a woman may start her menstrual cycles long before she has breasts, her breasts are an unmistakable symbol to the world that she is transitioning from being a girl to being a woman. This is one of the reasons that most insurance companies cover artificial breast replacements for women who lose their breasts due to cancer. It is because a woman’s breasts are key to her feeling like a woman.

A woman’s breasts are the perfect feeding instruments for infants

A woman’s breasts serve the needs of her children by feeding them the perfect nutrients as they grow and develop. Science today has proven that no formula can perfectly match the health benefits of a mother’s breast milk. Her breast milk changes to match the changing needs of her child as they grow and mature. Her breasts also serve the needs of her child by being a place of comfort for a young child.

9 But thou are he that took me out of the womb: thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother’s breasts.

– Psalm 22:9 (KJV)

A woman’s breasts are a blessing from God to man

But breasts are not only for feeding children. Female humans are the only mammals in God’s creation that keep constantly protruding breasts. A woman’s constantly protruding breasts serve the second function for which God made them: the pleasure and comfort of men.

25 Even by the God of thy father, who shall help thee; and by the Almighty, who shall bless thee with blessings of heaven above, blessings of the deep that lieth under, blessings of the breasts, and of the womb:

– Genesis 49:25 (KJV)

18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.

19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.

– Proverbs 5:18-19 (KJV)

10 I am a wall, and my breasts are like towers: then was I in his eyes as one that found favour.

– Song of Solomon 8:10 (KJV)

I will cover this in more detail when I write on human sexuality from a Christian perspective, but for now I will say this. A woman’s breasts serve two purposes: the feeding of infants, and the pleasure of and comfort of man. To say a woman’s breasts are only meant for feeding children would fly in the face of biology, psychology and most importantly the Bible.

Fat helps a woman look more attractive than a man

Contrary to modern preconceptions, fat, in and of itself, is not a bad thing for a woman. It can become a bad thing when there are excessive amounts of fat, but when fat is in the correct proportions it is one of the key things that makes a woman beautiful. In the same way that a man’s body naturally produces more muscle than a woman’s, a woman’s body naturally produces more fat than a man’s body.

Men should have an average of 9 to 15% of their body weight come from fat. Women, however, should have a range of 14 to 21% of their body weight from fat. So as you can see, a normal woman with a low percentage of body fat would be at the high end of where a man should be. On average, women typically have 50% more body fat than men and that is a good thing for several reasons.


Girls begin to add more fat just prior to and during puberty. This fat is distributed to their cheeks, lips, breasts, hips, pelvis and buttocks. It is only after they take in too much fat that it will be distributed to their stomach or elsewhere.

In fact, a woman produces and stores special fat in her hips, buttocks and legs called DHA. Her body uses this fat to help with infant brain development when she is pregnant. This fat (along a woman’s hips, buttocks and legs) is some of the more difficult for her to lose because her body is programmed to keep it for having children. That is why the ladies in the gym have to work so much harder on their legs, buttocks and hips to lose weight in those regions.

So ladies, fat is not always the enemy. In fact, contrary to the skinny, bony models we are shown on television or in ads, most men actually prefer curvy women.

An article in the 2012 issue of Psychology Today explains that men “know” something significant about women’s bodies that women don’t. And it all has to do with nature’s mandate to produce children with great survival skills. In fact, women are usually more like men’s ideals than they realize, and losing weight to meet the standard set by the fashion modeling industries may not make them any more attractive to men.

Men rate women as most attractive when they have a waste (sic) size that is 60-70% of this hip size. To put things in perspective: The typical US undergrad has a waist that is 75% of her hip size. The average Playboy playmate is 53%, and the average fashion model is 46%…

The total amount of fat a human female carries is seven times that of other animals, and much more than men. And the fat stored in women’s hips, butt, and legs is “protected” from weight fluctuations…

Babies have an organ that is seven times larger than in other animals – the brain. And it grows fastest in the first two years of life, and it only does so with ample supplies of the omega-3 fatty acid DHA. Guess where women’s bodies tend to stash DHA? In the hips and legs…

Women are much less satisfied with their bodies after viewing images of super-skinny models. However, men consistently prefer a curvier, fuller look that is nothing like the “ideal” presented by the fashion industry!

– Jonathan Ross (Discovery Health)


(Just FYI Discovery removed this article from their blog since I posted this – maybe because it was politically incorrect? I don’t know.)

So ladies – stop looking at all those skinny fashion models that have no curves and have bodies that look more like teenage boys than women. God made you the way you are for a reason.

Conclusion and Application

Whether you are a Christian reading this or a non-Christian, I invite you to examine the evidence both from biology as well as your own general observations of human behavior. Will there be exceptions? Yes. There are some women who have behaviors and abilities that more mimic the typical man, and there are some men who have behaviors and abilities that more mirror the typical woman. But these are rare.

As believers, we have a source of truth that not only confirms the differences we see in biology and typical gender behaviors, but it also gives a reason for the differences. It gives us a purpose, if we will only believe and accept it.

To the women I say, will you accept how God has made you? Will you accept the purpose for your differences and use them in accordance with his plan? Will you accept that God created you not to give the majority of your time and talents to strangers, but that he specially gifted you for bearing and raising children and supporting your husband? As a woman the greatest thing you can ever build in God’s sight is your home, not a career. Even if your abilities are not as strong as other women in various areas – will you pray to God to strengthen your weaknesses?

Moms – will you raise your daughters to be independent of men? Or, will you raise them to honor their God-given role of wife and mother and teach them to find a man and pour themselves 100% into being the best wife and mother a man could ever want? If you have a son, are you raising your daughters to be like the kind of wife you would want your son to have?

Husbands – will you accept your wife’s God-given need to have children, and to feel protected and secure? Will you accept that God has made women like a delicate vases and you need to treat them as the treasure God has given you? Will you show your daughters the special love that they need? Do you treat your wife the way you would want your daughter’s husband to treat her?

We must all accept that God has built women to be help meets to men and mothers to their children. Women are gifted with a special ability to empathize and nurture; they have multi-tasking and care-taking abilities. Women are built for beauty and comfort, to bring pleasure to both the eyes and bodies of men.

I have briefly mentioned God’s sexual design of woman, but I have not gone into great detail. I have opted to cover that in a completely separate paper because I really don’t believe I can do it justice in just a few paragraphs. Look for a separate post on human sexuality coming soon.

Other sources:





Why did God make woman?


While both man and woman were made for the glory of God, woman glorifies God by being the help meet to man that God designed her to be. Man was made in the image and likeness of God and specifically for the glory of God, but woman was made in the image of man. She was made specifically for man; she is the glory of man.

The Spiritual reasons why God made woman

7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.

8 For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man.

9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

– I Corinthians 11:7-9 (KJV)

Woman is made in the image of man, and yet she does retain some traits of the nature of God as well because she is made in the image of man, who was made in the image of God.

The relationship between man and woman is meant to be a symbol of the relationship between God and his people. The man exercises God’s leadership, protection and provision traits. Woman exercises God’s submission traits: as Christ was always fully submitted to the Father’s will, so should woman out of respect for God be fully submissive to her husband.

The New Testament confirms this symbolism:

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

– Ephesians 5:22-24 (KJV)

3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

– I Corinthians 11:3 (KJV)

The temporal reasons and roles for which God has made woman

This brings us to the temporal reasons why God made woman. God made woman as a suitable helper for man in this age. After this age the woman’s role as a helper to man, and marriage itself, will no longer exist.

34 And Jesus answering said unto them, The children of this world marry, and are given in marriage:

35 But they which shall be accounted worthy to obtain that world, and the resurrection from the dead, neither marry, nor are given in marriage:

36 Neither can they die any more: for they are equal unto the angels; and are the children of God, being the children of the resurrection.

– Luke 20:34-36

When I talk about temporal reasons, I mean before God does away with this earth and makes a new heaven and new earth. For the short time that we are born and live on this earth, God has placed us in temporary bodies and given us temporary roles to fulfill during this life. The gender roles God has assigned us are for this age and this time. In many ways it is like a test. If you are born in a man’s body, you have a man’s test to take. If you are born in a woman’s body, you have a woman’s test to take.

A companion for man

18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

– Genesis 2:18

God made man as a relational creature. Men are not designed to be alone. Woman was designed to meet the man’s need for companionship. While it is true that some are given the gift of being able to be celibate, the vast majority of God’s creation has never been given that gift and are not meant to be alone.

A trustworthy adviser for her husband

10 An excellent wife, who can find?…

11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,

And he will have no lack of gain.

12 She does him good and not evil

All the days of her life.

26 She opens her mouth in wisdom,

And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

– Proverbs 31:10a, 11-12 & 26 (NASB)

While the Bible never teaches the modern idea that a woman’s intuition is always right (in fact it teaches she can be deceived as Eve was), still, a wise and Godly woman is a great asset to her husband. He would do well to listen to her counsel before making decisions. But there is more to her than just her counsel. The Bible implies that she is his greatest ally, that she will never bring harm to him, and that he can always depend on her.

Her body is given her as a comfort and pleasure to her husband

24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

– Genesis 2:24 (KJV)

67 And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.

– Genesis 24:67 (KJV)

25 Even by the God of thy father, who shall help thee; and by the Almighty, who shall bless thee with blessings of heaven above, blessings of the deep that lieth under, blessings of the breasts, and of the womb:

– Genesis 49:25 (KJV)

19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.

– Proverbs 5:19 (KJV)

The concept that a wife’s body is one of the gifts she has been given to give to her husband does not mean that his body is not also a gift for her in this context. In fact, in the Song of Songs, the entire book is dedicated to the idea of the mutual physical love God designed a man and woman to be able to share within the bounds of marriage.

But God designed a man with a much stronger need for regular sex than a woman and the woman’s body is designed to meet this need even apart from just procreation. The Bible speaks of the fact that God has designed man and woman to become “one flesh” and while in marriage this can take on a spiritual as well as a physical meaning, it has at its core the idea of sexual union. God beautifully created a woman to be able to physically fit perfectly together with her husband in the act of sex.

While today our world has perverted God’s beautiful creation of sex, God displays the beauty of his gift of sexuality with no shame. A woman’s breasts (and by extension her body) were literally seen a “blessing” to man and not only for feeding his children. But they also were given to him by God as a gift, for his comfort and pleasure.

The bearer of mankind, caregiver and manager of the home

14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

– I Timothy 5:14 (KJV)

4 …teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

– Titus 2:4-5 (KJV)

10 An excellent wife, who can find?…

15 She rises also while it is still night

And gives food to her household…

19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,

And her hands grasp the spindle.

27 She looks well to the ways of her household,

And does not eat the bread of idleness.

– Proverbs 31:10a, 15a, 19 & 27 (NASB)

Not only did God make woman to be a companion and trusted adviser and ally to man, but he also gave her the sacred privilege and duty of bearing the sons and daughters of mankind. He gave her the responsibility to manage and keep the home while the man goes out and uses his God-given abilities to provide for their home.

In Proverbs 31, we see she provides food for her household, makes clothes (or in our day and age buys clothes for the family) and does not “eat the bread of idleness”, which means she is always doing things around the house; no one could even accuse her of neglecting her home.

God gave woman some physical characteristics to help her fulfill these roles for which she was designed. Some of these characteristics include:

  1. Estrogen in women causes them to have softer and more delicate skin than men. This makes a woman’s touch very soothing in her role as caregiver. It also makes a woman have finer, more delicate facial features than a man.
  2. A woman’s body purposefully retains more fat than a man’s body does. Her body does this for several reasons. Her fat is first distributed to her breasts, buttocks, hips and legs. This gives a woman that “curvy” look that God intended her to have. Scientists have recently discovered a special fat called DHA that is the crucial building block for infant brain development. A woman’s body pulls heavily from the fat in her hips, buttocks and legs to help her baby develop and after the baby is born the body continues pulling from this fat storage to produce breast milk. This also gives a woman’s body a more “cushy” feel than a man’s more typically muscular body. So this extra fat storage serves two purposes: one for reproduction and child rearing, and at the same time God has wired men to find the curvy look and cushy feel of a woman attractive.
  3. Human females are the only mammals whose breasts stay large (relatively speaking) even when not pregnant or nursing. Most other female mammals only have protruding breasts when they are filled with milk for nursing; human female breasts, however, are mostly filled with fat. The human female breasts always being present serves God’s intended design for them to be a place of comfort for children as well as a place of comfort and sexual pleasure for husbands.
  4. Woman’s brains are wired for more emotional intelligence than men. Men tend to be more left-brain dominant which makes them more task-oriented. Women use both sides of their brain which helps them to be more intuitive and relational than men.
  5. Because women are better able to understand, and pick up on emotions, this makes a woman much better suited to dealing with children (who can be extremely emotional). Her emotional intuitiveness helps her to better understand the needs of her infant child well before the child can actually speak.
  6. A woman’s emotional intelligence also helps her in her caregiver role, which is why most day-care workers are women, and most nurses are women.
  7. Women are typically less likely to take risks or do risky things than men and God designed this cautiousness in her to help protect her and her children (who are physically weaker than adult men).


God beautifully designed woman to be man’s help meet. He designed her body as well as her brain to be soft and gentle. She is amazingly built to bear and take care of children. Her emotional intelligence is a great asset to her husband. She plays a very important part in the spiritual symbolism of God’s relationship with his people where her submission and dependence upon her husband is symbolic of the submission and dependence that God wants his people to show toward him.


Why did God make man?


In our post-feminist culture God’s purpose for creating man is often lost. When I talk about “man”, I am not talking about “mankind”, or “humans”, I am talking about male human beings. Far too often even people who agree with a Biblical hierarchical view of marriage, will take every “man” statement in Scripture to be talking about mankind (men and women). This in my opinion is not always a correct interpretation of Scripture. Sometimes when God says “man”, he means “mankind” (men and women), other times he is specifically talking to or about males. From this point forward in this article, unless I say “mankind”, when I talk about man, I am referring to male human beings.

The Old Testament was written in Hebrew, many times when we see the Hebrew word for “man” it literally is the word “adam”. So when you see Adam or man in the OT, it may be the same Hebrew word in the sentence. The context of the sentence determines whether we translate it as “Adam” (using it as a name) versus “man” meaning either mankind or male human beings. The Old Testament also uses another word for man – (iysh), and woman (ishshah).

With all that as an introduction, let’s look through some of the most popular passages in the Bible describing God’s purpose for making man:

26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

– Genesis 1:26-27 (KJV)

After God had created all the animals and fish and insects and all the other life on earth, he wanted to make his prize creation. He wanted to make a being that would be in his image, like him. Now that did not mean making a being with all God’s powers and traits, but a being that would closely resemble his nature.

But what about “them” in Genesis 1:26-28?

Let’s look at this same passage from Genesis 1 and now we highlight a different portion of it:

26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

– Genesis 1:26-28 (KJV)

Those commentators who reject the fact that God made man directly in his image while making woman in the image of man will use the word “them” in these three verses to say God was saying he made “them” – both man and woman – in his image.

I do not dispute that the “them” in question is referring to both Adam and Eve, male and female. But what is missed in this is that giving Adam and Eve – all human beings, both male and female – dominion over nature does not mean God made Adam and Eve equally in his image. It also does not remove the fact that man was set over woman to say they both have dominion over nature.

But let’s look at parents. The Bible is clear that both the father and mother have authority over their children.

20 My son, keep thy father’s commandment, and forsake not the law of thy mother:

– Proverbs 6:20 (KJV)


1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

2 Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;

3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.

– Ephesians 6:1-3 (KJV)

So there is no question that parents are both given authority and dominion over their children, and they are both to be obeyed and honored by their children.

But while both have dominion over the children, the father is the one who retains ownership of them and the mother’s authority over the children operates under her husband’s authority over her.

Bringing this back around to the Genesis account – yes man and woman are both given dominion over creation, but we must remember Genesis 1 is a summary of the creation account, not the detail. Genesis 2 tells us the detail of how God gave man dominion over nature. God gave Adam the primary dominion and he exercised this authority by naming the animals according to their kinds:

19 And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the earth; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

– Genesis 2:19-20 (KJV)

Adam even exercised his authority over woman by naming her type as well:

23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

– Genesis 2:23 (KJV)

So on this issue of the dominion that was given to “them” we agree that it was given to both men and women. But we see based on Genesis 2 that Adam was given the primary dominion over nature and Eve’s dominion was given only under the authority of Adam in the same way that both parents (a father and mother) have dominion over their children, but the father retains primary authority.

But in NO WAY does the fact that all human beings (both men and women) having dominion over nature take away from the order that God established with man being the owner and head of woman. It also does not support the claim that both man and woman are equally made in God’s image.

Other Scriptures refute the idea that both man and woman are both made in God’s image (as opposed to just man being created in God’s image). In the New Testament, Paul makes it very clear that God was specifically talking about making man (males) in his image and even distinguishes between men and women:

7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of man.

– I Corinthians 11:7 (KJV)

Woman is made in the image of man, and yes she does retain some traits of the nature of God as well because she is made in the image of man, who was made in the image of God.

But the point is, man in his design and nature matches more closely to God than woman does in her design and nature. This fact is further backed by the fact that God is always referred to in the masculine in such terms as “Father” and “Husband” and Christ was incarnated in the form of a man.

Throughout the Bible, the woman is symbolic of mankind, and the man is symbolic of God. This is why in the Old Testament and the New Testament God’s relationship with man is pictured as that of a husband to his wife, or father to his children.

The New Testament confirms this symbolism:

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

– Ephesians 5:23 & 31 (KJV)

The eternal and spiritual reason why God made man was to make an image of himself for his glory and honor.

The spiritual reason for marriage is right here in Ephesians 5 – God wants man and woman to marry to symbolize the relationship between him and his people. The husband symbolizes him, and the wife symbolizes his people.

The temporal reasons and roles for which God has made man

 This brings us to some other reasons why God made man. As we said previously, the eternal and spiritual reason why God made man was to make a being in his image for his honor and glory. But there are some temporal reasons why God made man as well, that actually tie back into his more eternal reason for making man. In order to symbolize God’s leadership of his people, his provision for his people, and his protection of his people, God has given man these roles during this life.

When I talk about temporal reasons, I mean before God does away with this earth and makes a new heaven and new earth. For the short time that we are born and live on this earth, God has placed us in temporary bodies and given us temporary roles to fulfill during this life. In many ways it is like a test. If you are born in a man’s body, you have a man’s test to take. If you are born in a woman’s body, you have a woman’s test to take.


 God designed men to lead in society, the church and the home. Some men may be able to exercise leadership in all three of these areas. Some men may or may not exercise leadership in society and the church. But all men are called to exercise leadership in the home.

3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

– I Corinthians 11:3 (KJV)

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

– Ephesians 5:23-24 (KJV)

 One note on I Corinthians 11:3. Some have tried to argue that the phrase “the head of the woman is man” could also be translated as “the head of the wife is the husband“. This is because the Greek word for “woman”, Gune, can also be translated as “wife” and the Greek word for “man”, Aner, can also be translated as “husband” as they appear in Ephesians 5:22-33.

The problem is that the context of I Corinthians 11:3 is very different than the context of Ephesians 5. Ephesians 5:22-33 is specifically speaking about marriage and the relationship between a husband and wife. I Corinthians 11 is speaking of the reasons for a woman to wear a head covering during worship. Paul begins his discussion by showing that woman is under the authority of man, just as man is under the authority of Christ, and Christ is under the authority of God the Father. He goes into creation to show that woman was made for man, not man for woman, and that because she is under the authority of man, a woman ought to have a sign of authority on her head.

There was absolutely no distinction made by Paul between married and unmarried women in regards to head coverings. All women were under the general authority of men, and needed to wear head coverings in worship acknowledging this fact (and they still should today, but don’t get me started on that).


 God designed men to protect in society and in the family. Men are uniquely built and qualified for law enforcement and military service. But even if a man does not serve in these types of roles, all men are called to protect their family. Men are called to sacrifice themselves for those who are under their protection.

14 …Be not ye afraid of them: remember the Lord, which is great and terrible, and fight for your brethren, your sons, and your daughters, your wives, and your houses.

– Nehemiah 4:14b (KJV)


25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

– Ephesians 5:25 & 28-30 (KJV)

In modern times we look at the word “cherish” as a more romantic word. A lot of faulty Christian marriage advice has been poured into this old English word “cherish”. But the English word “cherish” is actually translating the Greek word Thalpo that has the idea of protection and care, the way a mother hen would sit on her eggs to warm them and protect them.


 God designed men to provide for their society, church and family. Men are designed to work and produce to help society (through payment of taxes or public service), provide offerings to their church, and most importantly to provide food, clothing and shelter for their family.

 8 But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he had denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

– I Timothy 5:8 (NASB)

Again speaking of husbands and wives:

 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

 – Ephesians 5:29-30 (KJV)

The word for “nourisheth” has the idea of providing food for one’s wife (and by extension family).

The Old Testament speaks of this provision that a man is responsible to his wife for:

 10 If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing and marital rights.

– Exodus 21:10 (NIV)

It is clear from the Scriptures that God gave man a solemn responsibility to provide for his wife and family.

God gave man some physical characteristics to help him fulfill these roles for which he was designed. Some of these characteristics include:

  1. Testosterone causes men to have a lot more muscle mass on average than women, where men have 50% or more upper body strength than women most of the time. The typical man is much more suited to physical labor, athletics and combat than the typical woman.
  2. Men have a higher red blood cell count than women, which gives men far better physical endurance than women.
  3. Men have thicker and tougher skin than women (about 25% thicker) and more hair on their skin. A man’s extra body hair (including facial hair), in addition to the thickness and toughness of his skin, makes him better suited to brave the elements than a woman. Also because of the thickness and toughness of his skin, he is better suited for combat than a woman.
  4. Most studies show that men and women have the same average intelligence. However, they also show that men have much more variation in intelligence than women. What this means is there are more below average-intelligence men than women, but at the same time there are more highly intelligent and genius-level men than highly intelligent and genius-level women.
  5. Men are generally much bigger risk takers than women, which is why men often do better in the business world, in science and in war than women do.
  6. Men are often better able to compartmentalize their emotions, which oftentimes makes them better in leadership positions, or in high-stress situations.
  7. Men tend to be more left-brain dominated, which makes them more task-oriented. Together with their other qualities of higher endurance, more muscle mass, and thicker skin this makes a man well suited to work, protect and lead as God has designed him to.



 God made man in his image and likeness to bring glory and honor to himself. To demonstrate some of his eternal qualities he has designed and delegated man to lead, provide, and protect in society, the church and most importantly the family.