Biblical Self Defense

How a Husband Can Enjoy Sex That Causes His Wife Pain

/ biblicalgenderroles / 6 Comments

Your wife has been to all the specialists and has recently been given the bad news.  She has a chronic and incurable form of dyspareunia. Sexual intercourse will always be painful for her and there is nothing medically that can be done.

When you first got married, your wife hid her pain from you.  But you, being the loving husband that you are decided to delve deep into your wife’s thoughts on sex.  You wanted to see what you could do better in the bedroom. You thought you were doing ok and she seemed to enjoy sex with you but sometimes you thought you sensed some pain on her face.  You would ask her if she wanted you to stop and she would say no and that she wanted you to continue.

So, your loving wife, not wanting to hide anything from you as her husband gave you the bad news.  Every time you had sexual intercourse it was painful for her.  Every time.  She explains that this is why she would sometimes come up to you and give you oral sex and finish you off before you could try intercourse with her.

From that night on you could not have sexual intercourse with her anymore. And it was not because she did not want to or would not let you if you tried.  She offered it on several occasions.  But you could not even entertain the thought of causing your wife pain so you could experience pleasure.

Sure, she helped you orally and manually for the past year as you went with her to many specialists to see if her dyspareunia could be treated. But oral and manual sex while offering relief, could not offer the bonding feeling you felt from being inside your wife.

But from the moment you made the decision to stop having sexual intercourse with your wife, despite her offers to do so, you began to feel the intimacy between you and her diminish.  You longed for that eruption of affection and bonding you felt for her each time after having intercourse.  And that special affection would sometimes last for days.

You used to love oral sex from her when you did not know why she was doing it (to avoid the pain of intercourse).  Now it is only a painful reminder of the intercourse with your wife that you can never have again.

You got all the books. You tried to convince yourself of the things that so many people teach.  That sex is not a need for a man.  It’s all in your head.  You don’t really need sexual intercourse with your wife to feel that special affection and bonding you felt only after intercourse with her.   You can cultivate it in other ways.  You can feel that same feeling from oral or manual sex with her.

But none of it is working.  You know you need to have intercourse with your wife to fuel your affection for her and feel bonded to her.  She wants to have sexual intercourse with you despite her chronic and incurable dyspareunia.

But how can you have sex with your wife, and find any pleasure knowing that every movement that gives you pleasure causes her pain?

Sex is a Need for You as a Man

Many Christian and non-Christians teach that sex is not a need for men, but simply a want.  Even though your desire for sex as a man mimics your hunger for food it is not a need since you won’t die from not having sex, or so you are told.  You are told that your desire to have sex with your wife is no different than your desire for a new car, a new hunting rifle or a new video game and is no more a need than any of these other things are.

The Bible however reveals that sex is a God-given, built in NEED for men. 

In Proverbs 5:15-19 we read the following descriptions and prescriptions for sex for men:

“15 Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. 16 Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets. 17 Let them be only thine own, and not strangers’ with thee. 18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.”

In the passage above God tells you that sex is a need for you just as water is a need for you.  In fact, the comparison of your need for water to your need for sex is a very accurate reflection of the male nature.  Both men and women need sex and even the Bible acknowledges that women need sex as well (See Exodus 21:10-11).

But for a woman sex is just one of many needs she has and it not a defining aspect of her she is.  It is not the driving force in her nature and her life that is in you as a man.

Think of sex as its highest level and what it does for you as a man.  We often think of sex as something that depletes our energy and that is true on some levels.  Immediately after sex we will feel a great relaxation come over us because of all the chemicals released by our brain.  We may even want to roll over and go to sleep.

But there are other things that take place in the male brain as a result of sex.  Men receive a HUGE psychological boost immediately after sex for hours or often times days.  We feel a huge increase in affection for our wife, we feel more bonded and closer to her and it can even fuel us in our drive in our jobs.

This is all by the design of God.  This is why the longer you go without sex with your wife, the thirstier you feel.   Because God made you to desire your wife’s body and to be physically joined within her in the same way you desire water.  And your sexual nature is just as dominate in you as a man as water is a dominate feature within all human beings (our bodies our made up over 60% water).

Men Need More Than Just Orgasms, They Need Penile Vaginal Intercourse

Multiple studies over many years have proven that what researchers call “PVI” or Penile Vaginal Intercourse has the greatest health affects for both men and women.  They specifically compared the levels of chemical releases and the physiological and psychological effects between PVI and other forms of sexual release such as oral sex, anal sex and masturbation and PVI by far showed the best effects.

For instance, the hormone prolactin released at orgasm during PVI is 400% higher than other forms of sexual release including masturbation, anal sex or oral sex.  Evolutionists try and explain this as something our bodies developed to steer us toward vaginal intercourse over other forms of sexual release so we would reproduce. But as Christians we know that God designed everything about sex – and it was not just for reproduction.

Both men and women release hormones like dopamine, testosterone, estrogen, oxytocin, prolactin, vasopressin and serotine during sexual stimulation of any kind (PVI or other).  The difference is in the amount of these chemicals released in men and women and interactions within their overall body chemistry.

Let’s take dopamine for example.  Dopamine is “the pleasure hormone”.  It is what the body releases when we are doing something that is pleasurable to us.  It is a reward system of sorts. In men the effects of dopamine are supercharged by the fact that a man has 10 times the testosterone in his system that a woman does.  It does not mean women don’t have pleasure from sex, but they don’t get as big a high off sex as men do because of their lower testosterone levels.

On the other hand, women can have 10 to 20 times the estrogen in their bodies that men have in theirs.  And while oxytocin is released in both men and women during any sex it is most potent in women when combined with their higher levels of estrogen.  This can cause women to have far greater emotional attachment to a man during and especially after sex.

The point is this.  Those who say if a wife suffers from chronic dyspareunia that PVI intercourse should cease and be replaced with masturbation or oral sex do not understand the extremely negative physiological and psychological effects that this brings on both husbands and wives and their marriages.  The short amount of pain a woman experiences during PVI is a much smaller price to pay than the long-term damage to a relationship of no more PVI.

This is why God put the greatest longing for sexual relations, and PVI in particular in men.  And this is why neither oral sex or masturbation done by yourself or even that which is performed by your wife can bring you together in the way that PVI will do.  It is only through PVI that you can be fully united with your wife and truly be one flesh as God intended you to be.

This is why you must reject the lies that you will hear so often as a man.

Men only desire sex for pleasure and for no other reason –  This is a LIE.

God wants sex to only occur if it is both mutually desired and mutually pleasurable for both the husband and wife – This is a LIE. 

Husbands desire sex to be one flesh with their wife in the fullest way God intended.  And remember that last phrase – “God intended”.   That is a truth you must ingrain in your mind as you remove the lies that have been infused in your mind by your cultural upbringing.

 Suffering for the Benefit of Others Is a Christian Virtue

The Scriptures tell us:

“For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps”

I Peter 2:21

What this means is that your wife’s willingness to suffer pain during sexual intercourse with you is a holy and righteous act before God.  In doing this she is following the example of Christ.  And you must remember that she is not just doing this for you, she is doing this for your marriage which she is a part of.

Your wife, by joyfully enduring suffering during sexual intercourse for you and your marriage is “walking worth of the Lord” as seen in Colossians 1:10-11:

“That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; Strengthened with all might, according to his glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness; “

Christ makes the follow observation of a woman when she experiences pain in childbirth:

“A woman when she is in travail hath sorrow, because her hour is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world.” – John 16:21

Your wife knows that the pain she is experiencing is only temporary and she will “remembereth no more the anguish” for the joy of making you feel bonded to her and the joy of seeing your heart filled with affection for her.

This is NOT Sexual Sadism

A Sexual Sadist is one who derives sexual pleasure or is aroused by causing someone else pain.

The Bible condemns sadism in several passages including the following passage from Mark 7:20-23:

“20 And he said, That which cometh out of the man, that defileth the man. 21 For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, 22 Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: 23 All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.”

The English word “wickedness” found in verse 22 is a translation of the Greek word ‘’Poneria” not to be confused with “Porneia” which refers to sexually immoral acts.  This word refers to taking pleasure from causing others pain.

The English phrase “evil eye” also found in verse 22 is a translation of the Greek words “Poneros” and “Ophthalmos”.  What this phrase refers to is one who derives pleasure from watching another person cause pain to others.

God shows us in Revelation 21:4 that suffering and pain are a result of the corrupting influence of sin on this world:

“And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” – Revelation 21:4

If you are a man who is sexually aroused by and sexually fueled by causing your wife pain you must recognize this is part of sin’s evil corruption of your sexual nature.  This is NOT by the design of God.

On the other hand, if your sexual nature is more closely aligned to the way God created it, you as a man will actually be turned off by your wife’s pain.  It will be difficult for you to have sex with her knowing it would cause her pain.  Her pain does not arouse you in the least bit.

But if your wife who suffers from chronic and incurable dyspareunia offers to have sexual intercourse with you despite the pain knowing she will suffer and then you do so and derive pleasure from the experience are you guilty of engaging in sexual sadism?

The answer is NO.

There is a world of difference between allowing yourself to experience sexual pleasure DESPITE your wife’s pain and you deriving sexual pleasure FROM your wife’s pain.

This then brings us to the main question of this article.

How You Can Enjoy Sex Despite Your Wife’s Pain

As a husband who loves your wife you may be saying at this point – “I understand it is not wrong for me to desire sexual intercourse with my wife nor to take her up on her offer even though it will cause her pain to do so, but I just can’t.  I can’t have sex with her knowing it will cause her pain.  I certainly cannot take any pleasure from such an act”.

But as I have shown earlier – God placed the desire in you for sexual intercourse for more than simply pleasure. Stop believing that lie that the world tries to tell you and even many Christian teachers try to tell you. God placed that desire in you so that a special oneness, a oneness that only occurs through penile vaginal intercourse can and will occur.  It is your duty and obligation to overcome your lack of arousal because of your wife’s pain.

In the same way she must overcome her pain to become one with you, so too you must overcome her pain to become one with her.

The answer to this is very similar to an answer I gave a few years back in my article entitled “How a husband can enjoy sex that is grudgingly given by his wife”.  The major difference in that situation and this one is that you have a wife willingly and sacrificially having sex with you and not a wife who is grudgingly having sex with you.

But both these types of sexual situations do have something in common.   Your wife’s face may not be pleasant to look upon during this experience.  She may try her best to hide the pain, but you may still see it on her face.  So, like in the case of sex with a wife who has grudgingly consented to do so, you need to look away from your wife’s face.  Enjoy the rest of her body that God has given to you as your sexual well.

Once you train yourself to do this, knowing that your wife in this case is lovingly sacrificing herself for you, knowing this is righteous act before God and knowing that this will actually help bond you together and fuel your affection for her then you will actually be able to enjoy this experience despite your wife’s dyspareunia.

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” – Ephesians 5:31

Are Mass Shootings A Result of Biblical Masculinity?

/ biblicalgenderroles / 8 Comments

With the mass shooting at a Florida High School by Nikolas Cruz we are not only seeing the call to restrict gun rights but we are also seeing the misandrists coming out again. Never missing an opportunity to express their misandry, these haters of all things masculine are now saying the traits of masculinity which the Bible commands are actually the cause of mass shootings.

Alia E. Dastagir in her article entitled “Are boys ‘broken’? Another mass shooting renews debate on toxic masculinity” for USAToday.com writes:

“The problem Black identifies is one feminists have been talking about for decades. It’s called toxic masculinity, the stereotypical sense of masculinity that embodies behaviors, such as denying help or emotions, which psychologists and sociologists say are harmful to men and to society. It’s the things in our culture — from toys given to movies watched to messages parents consciously and unconsciously send — that tells boys and men “being a real man” means repressing feelings and consistently demonstrating strength and dominance.

“We often talk about gender in terms of women … getting the short end of the stick. … Well, masculinity isn’t easy either,” Jennifer Carlson, a sociology professor at the University of Arizona who studies gun politics and gender, told USA TODAY after the mass shooting in Las Vegas last October. “That’s not your ticket to the good life. It isn’t easy to be a man in the United States. Demands put on men — whether it’s to be the protector, to be the provider, to respond to situations in certain ways, to prove yourself as a man — end up being not just outwardly destructive but also inwardly destructive.“

Who is it that places these “demands” on men?

Is it American culture, Western culture or just remnants of Bronze Age cultures that places the demand on men to demonstrate “strength and dominance” and to “be the protector” and “be the provider”?

The answer is found in these passages of the Bible:

“Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.”

I Corinthians 16:13 (NASB)

“Therefore, keep up your courage, men”

Acts 27:25 (NASB)

 “When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are undisturbed.”

Luke 11:21 (NASB)

“Man goes forth to his work and to his labor until evening.”

Psalm 104:23 (NASB)

“Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will stand before kings; He will not stand before obscure men.”

Proverbs 22:29 (NASB)

“A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, and the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous.”

Proverbs 13:22 (NASB)

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,  so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,  that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.  So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body.”

Ephesians 5:25-29 (NASB)

The answer from the Scriptures is it is God who places the demand on men to be strong, to dominate and to be providers and protectors. A man who lacks courage, displays weakness, fails to have a commanding influence over others and fails to provide and protect is not living up to God’s standard for men.

Why does God have these standards for men? Because God created man to be his image bearer:

“For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man.”

I Corinthians 11:7 (NASB)

Why does God want men to be strong? Because he is strong.

Why does God want men to be dominant? Because he is dominant.

Why does God want men to be providers? Because he is our provider.

Why does God want men to be protectors? Because he is our protector.

Violent Crimes Are Mostly Committed By Men and Water Is Wet

Alia E. Dastagir in her article entitled “Are boys ‘broken’? Another mass shooting renews debate on toxic masculinity” makes an astounding statement about men and violent crime:

“A 2017 study in the Journal of Adolescent Health found many norms around gender, what’s expected of boys and girls, become entrenched in adolescence and have negative impacts that carry into adulthood.

Among consequences the study noted when boys conform to gender stereotypes:

Engaging in physical violence to a much greater extent than girls

Dying more frequently from unintentional injuries

Being more prone to substance abuse and suicide

Having a shorter life expectancy than women

Data shows gun violence is disproportionately a male problem. Of the 97 mass shootings in which three or more victims died since 1982, only three were committed by women (one of those being the San Bernardino attack in which a man also participated), according to a database from the liberal-leaning news outlet Mother Jones. Men also accounted for 86% of gun deaths in the United States, according to an analysis by the non-partisan non-profit Kaiser Family Foundation.”

Men commit vastly more violent crimes than women and men make up the vast majority of mass shooters and water is wet.

I love it when writers show they have a firm grasp of the obvious.  Men by their very nature to a greater or lesser degree are capable of great violence much more so than most women.  Every person since the beginning of humanity could tell us that.

Is Violence Always A Bad Thing?

In most cases the word “violence” is used to denote the unlawful or wrongful use of force.  But we all know there are violent acts that are justified and that we would even welcome.  We would all agree that what Nikolas Cruz did at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida was an unlawful and wrongful act of violence.   But imagine if that school had armed security guards and they acted “violently” against Nikolas Cruz by filling him full of bullets when he started shooting? Both would be acts of violence.  But one would have been a just act of violence and the other was unjust.

The Bible tells us that God actually puts in man his aggressive tendencies and his ability to perform violent acts:

“Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle”

Psalm 144:1 (NASB)

My point is this.  Men being capable of violence is not a bad thing.  It is by the design of God.  It becomes a bad thing when men use their ability to act in violence in sinful and wrong ways.

It irks me when I hear people all the time say that boys watching violent war movies, super hero shows or cop shows makes them violent. It is like saying women watching shows that are more drama based and less action and violence based makes them more emotional and relational.

The truth is that most boys like to watch violent war movies, super hero shows, cop shows and other action shows because they ARE action oriented and violent by nature in the same way that women more often watch drama shows because they ARE more emotionally and relationally oriented.

I actually encouraged and played war games like Medal of Honor, Call of Duty and Battlefield and many other “violent” video games with my boys growing up.  But at the same time I taught them about the responsible use of force and gun safety.

Speaking of gun safety.  When my boys were little and had toy guns if the gun looked anywhere near a real gun it would have to have a bright red tip on the end.  I would never let my boys have a toy gun like the one in the picture at the top of this article that was totally black.  There have been many sad stories where a police officer thought a toy gun was real and tragedy happened and I did not want that happening with my kids.

I own a hand gun which I have taught my boys how to use when we have gone on men’s camping retreats with our church.  My second oldest son who is 18 is an avid hunter (which I am not) and he owns a couple of shot guns, several bows and he recently purchased an AR-15 assault rifle (the same style of gun used by Cruz) about a month ago.  We plan on going to a state run outdoor shooting range where we can use his new gun with some of his other guns.  Of course you know who has to buy the ammo for these excursions? Yep you guessed it – dear old Dad.

I am a firm believer in boys being able to exercise their aggressive tendencies in healthy and controlled ways like going to shooting ranges, playing sports and playing violent video games. As long as we do these things in balance and they do not over power us in our lives or become addictions (and yes sports and hunting and shooting can become an addiction just like video games) then they can be used for our benefit.

My boys know the answer I always give when women come around(whether it is step moms, aunts, cousins) and say things like “why do you boys always have to play those violent video games or watch violent movies” I tell them “Because we are men”.

Most men want to use their aggressive and violent tendencies to defend others – not to commit wrong acts

I just took my boys and my daughter to watch the Black Panther movie this weekend as I have most of the Marvel Movies.  Who do you think they were rooting for? The hero or the villain? The one trying to protect people or the one trying to hurt people? The God given masculine desire to be a protector goes hand in hand with the God given masculine ability to fight and be aggressive.  It is a defining attribute of who men are.

When our culture says that violence and aggressiveness are a “male problem” they are in essence saying men need to be more like women.  The problem is not violence and aggressiveness in and of themselves – it is the wrongful use of violence and aggressiveness that is the issue. That is part of the sin nature.

And all these pansies that are trying to neuter the aggressive and violent side of the masculine nature would be BEGGING for it if their home, cities or nation were ever invaded.  We would be praising this side of masculinity – not trying to erase it.

We Will Never Totally Eliminate Evil From The World

And let me give another news flash to my liberal friends who think we can use social engineering to get rid of the sinful inclinations of mankind.  Only God change the sinful heart of man. Only God can completely rid this world of sin and evil and one day he will. No social program, no rehabilitation program will do this.  I am all for encouraging things like strong families and especially strong fathers in the homes teaching their wives and children the ways of God.  This would go a long way to reducing violent crime and a lot of problems that our society is seeing.

But long before the corruption of feminism upon society in the last 150 years – violent acts happened.  Massacres happened over the entire history of mankind.  This is nothing new. Man has certainly used his violent and aggressive tendencies to prey on the weak and act in the some of the most evil and heinous ways.  But man has also used his aggressive tendencies toward violence to defend the weak and powerless and to destroy evil aggressors.

So while we certainly should support mental health reforms and increased funding for mental hospitals where we can lock up those who are a danger to themselves or society we must also approach this from a defensive posture.  It is our duty as men to defend our homes, our towns, our schools and our nation.   We need to push for trained and armed security personnel whether they are security guards or retired police officers or retired military personnel to be stationed at our schools.  We need to allow teachers who are properly trained in the use of weapons to carry hand guns.  We need to stop having schools be gun-free zones which basically just paints a big bullseye on them for crazy and evil folks who want to hurt others.

Conclusion

It is not men following Biblical gender roles or the expectation that men should be strong protectors and providers that is a “destructive” influence that is causing these mass shootings.  Rather the root of these heinous and evil acts is the same root of sexual sins like adultery and homosexuality.  These evils that mankind does are caused by the corruption of sin upon our God given male and female human natures.

We all are “broken” – both boys and girls, men and women by sin and this is nothing new. It has been with mankind since Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden thousands of years ago.  And only Jesus Christ can mend us.

“7 For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. 8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”

Romans 5:7-8 (NASB)

New York City man beats his wife’s would-be rapist to death

/ biblicalgenderroles / 8 Comments

A 61 year old New York man beats a man to death who broke into his home and assaults his wife and her sister – and what is our civilized modern response? Arrest the man for man slaughter.

Here is more on this story from dailymail.co.uk:

“The New York City man who beat his wife’s would-be rapist to death was released from custody on Tuesday evening to a chorus of cheers.

Mamadou Diallo was hailed by members of the Guinean community and his family as he left the Bronx Criminal Court after the judge freed him on his own recognizance.

The 61-year-old was arrested on Monday night and charged with manslaughter after he battered Earl Nash to death with a tire iron inside his Bronx apartment building elevator.

Diallo was outside his building when his wife, 51, called and said a man had broken in, dropped his pants and said, ‘I’m going to rape you.’

Diallo ran inside, caught up with the attacker identified as Nash, 43, and fractured his skull with the steel lever as Nash tried to fight back with his belt, the NY Daily News reported.

Nash died at Lincoln Hospital from ‘severe trauma to his head and body’ about three hours later, according to police.”

You can read their full story here – http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3617884/Husband-charged-manslaughter-beating-man-broke-apartment-tried-rape-wife.html

It is utterly amazing to me how little common sense our modern society has. In times past this man would have been given a medal for this – today we call him a criminal.

Man’s God given right to defend and avenge his family

The family was instituted by God before other institutions like civil governments or the church.  There are certain natural rights that cannot be taken away or canceled by other governing authorities.  The right to self-defense and the right to avenge the blood of a family member can never be canceled.

Most people, even non-Christians recognize these natural rights.  That is why there is about a 90% chance that when this man goes to trial a jury will acquit him of all charges because we all know these are natural instinctual rights that we all believe we have.

Biblical principles that show the right of self-defense and avenging of family:

Principle #1 – The penalty for murder is death

“Whoso sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.” – Genesis 9:6 (KJV)

Killing another person for unjust reasons is a crime worthy of death.

Principle # 2 – The penalty for rape of a man’s wife is death

“25 But if a man find a betrothed damsel in the field, and the man force her, and lie with her: then the man only that lay with her shall die.” – Deuteronomy 22:25 (KJV)

If a man rapes a another‘s man’s wife (a betrothed woman was also considered his wife) then he had committed a crime worth of death.

Principle #3 – Violating the security of a man’s home is a crime worthy of death

“2 If a thief be found breaking up, and be smitten that he die, there shall no blood be shed for him. 3 If the sun be risen upon him, there shall be blood shed for him; for he should make full restitution; if he have nothing, then he shall be sold for his theft.” – Exodus 22:2-3 (KJV)

Why was it ok to kill a thief at night but not during the day? It is was because at night you could not tell what he was there to do.  Was he there to harm you or your family? You did not know so you could rightly kill him. But during the day you could clearly see if he was simply trying to steal something verses harm you or your family.

The point of this passage was – you cannot kill a man for simply breaking into your home and stealing something.  But you CAN kill a man for breaking into your home if you think his intent is to do you or your family harm or he has already done you or your family harm.

Principle #4 – Family members may avenge the blood of their family

“The revenger of blood himself shall slay the murderer: when he meeteth him, he shall slay him.” – Numbers 35:19 (KJV)

Principle #5 – Fighting for you family is not optional, it is a responsibility

“…fight for your brethren, your sons, and your daughters, your wives, and your houses.” – Nehemiah 14:4 (KJV)

“No man can enter into a strong man’s house, and spoil his goods, except he will first bind the strong man; and then he will spoil his house.” – Mark 3:27 (KJV)

In Nehemiah we see him commanding the people of Jerusalem to defend themselves against those who would harm them or their families.

Christ tells us the only way a man can enter a person’s home to do wrong is if he binds the strong man – this would be husband or man of the house.  The man of the house is expected to protect his home.

The rage of a man whose wife has been taken by another

One other thing I want to mention that I think is related to what happened with this man and his wife’s rapist. God has naturally built into man a natural burning anger and vengeance against a man that would violate his wife.  Whether that man is raping his wife or his wife is having consensual sex with another man this instinctual and primal “rage” is the same.

The passage below from Proverbs tells us about this natural instinct God has put in men:

“28 Can one go upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned? 29 So he that goeth in to his neighbour’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent.

30 Men do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy his soul when he is hungry; 31 But if he be found, he shall restore sevenfold; he shall give all the substance of his house.

32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. 33 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away.

34 For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. 35 He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts.” – Proverbs 6:28-35 (KJV)

Now while this passage above is talking about adultery and not rape the principle is the same.  The key phrase is “therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance”.  As men we are designed to want to kill any man who violates our wife whether with her consent or without her consent.

John Gill says this about Proverbs 6:34:

“therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance;

when he has an opportunity of avenging himself; whenever he finds the adulterer in his house, or catches him and his wife in bed together, he spares not to take away his life, and sometimes the life of both of them; instances of this nature history furnishes us with: or he will spare no cost and pains to prosecute him before a civil magistrate, and bring him to public justice; prayers and entreaties, bribes and gifts, wilt be of no avail, as follows.”

http://www.biblestudytools.com/commentaries/gills-exposition-of-the-bible/proverbs-6-34.html

Under God’s law not only could the man laying with the wife be killed, but also a man’s wife as well:

“If a man be found lying with a woman married to an husband, then they shall both of them die, both the man that lay with the woman, and the woman: so shalt thou put away evil from Israel.” – Deuteronomy 22:22 (KJV)

If a husband found another man lying with his wife and in his rage and vengeance killed them both he would be justified in doing so and nothing would have happened to him during Biblical times.

Today we put husbands in prison for this.  In Biblical times the husbands vengeance in this matter would have served as a warning to both men and women.

To men – do not ever touch another’s man’s wife, it could cost you your life.

To women – not only could adultery lead to divorce, it could cost you your life.

Conclusion

Under God’s law Mamadou Diallo was right to be “hailed” as he was by his community rather than being arrested by the police. What he did to that attacker of his family should serve as a warning to all who would violate the sanctity of another man’s home or violate another’s man’s wife.